


Institutionalized Cruelty

by repressivist



Series: Kiki’s canon [2]
Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Angst, Fantasizing, Fluff but it gets pulled out from under you, I’m sorry if this doesnt make sense, Kinnie fic, M/M, Ouma not Oma, Themes of suicide, vent fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2021-01-15 18:33:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21257747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/repressivist/pseuds/repressivist
Summary: Six months ago, he killed himself. Kaito can still swear he hears his voice in the morning.





	Institutionalized Cruelty

Kokichi remembered every second of the game with fervor. It wasn’t too bad, he thought. It could have been worse. It wasn’t like he had standards as to how he should be treated. He’d feel betrayed and used of course, but he could never put his finger on how to show others that.

His chest ached and his eyes stung. His heart felt heavy..

Nerves screaming in pain and skin ripping open.

Flesh splitting and brain thumping violently against his skull.

His eyes shot open.

Crickets chirped outside the window. He could hardly breathe and he felt hot tears forming involuntary little rivers on his face. His nose scrunched and his lips trembled as he surveyed the room, reminding himself calmly beneath his breath that he was safe and that the strong arm around his waist was to keep him that way..

His breath slowed once he linked his fingers with Kaito’s. He was safe.. He’s safe… 

  
  


Kaito’s eyes flutter open, heart full of pulsing cinders, greeting the morning sunshine expectantly. He remembers the forecast for the morning.

As if on cue, just as he processes the news channel in his head again, their home assistant jingles to life.

_ Six AM, Kaito! Time to get up! _

His lithe boyfriend in his arms groans softly, snuggling back into Kaito like a cold kitten. 

_ The high today is sixteen degrees Celsius, or for Omakase, sixty degrees Fahrenheit. _

Omakase was the nickname Kaito gave him while they stayed in the hospital. Kokichi had a tendency to insist that the astronaut shouldn’t trust him. Of course, Kaito is… in Kokichi’s eloquent words, a spiteful bitch.

“Alexa, define Omakase.” Kaito requests, running his fingers through Kokichi’s hair.

_ Omakase. _

_ Omakase is a japanese phrase most commonly used for chefs. Its meaning is: “I trust you”. _

Kaito chuckles softly, kissing his whining partner on his pale forehead, strong hand holding back his bangs.

“You freaking dork… Every day…”

He sighs softly, tiredly. Visibly not a morning person.

His more excitable, puppy-like boyfriend hums gently, pulling him close by the waist.

“Only for you, starshine~..” Earns him a soft whine. “You’re just mad because you love me, honey.”

“I’m  _ mad _ because I’m sleepy.. I don’t even wanna do anything at six…”

“What!” Kaito gasps dramatically, cradling the boy close as he rose up out of bed, “We’re going on a date today! We’re going out for tea, then we’re gonna go to the library…”

“Wanna spend more time cuddling with Kai-chan..” Kokichi rubbed his eyes, socked feet nudging cloth down over his ankles to cover up his anemic skin.

“Well, we can cuddle while we get ready… And besides, I’m gonna make breakfast and watch TV for a little while, so you can nap for a couple hours on my lap.”

Kokichi let his head loll into Kaito, _lifeless, grey eyes_ _begging him, wordlessly reminding him that it was his fault this happened to him._

Kokichi sighs and smiles tiredly, squirming in his arms.

“You’re so… Dumb…” He breathed, letting his cold body fall close to Kaito’s..

The astronaut let out a shaky breath as his daydream melted away with, the red numbers of the digital clock piercing his eyes, flashing.

_ 3:00 p.m. _

The clock’s face faded.

_ 17 Missed calls from Saihara, Makiroll, Kaede. _

His life had become a disaster of avoiding everyone, time after time. People called and people worried and people needed him, but he couldn’t handle all the yelling, all the screaming,  _ all the crying,  _

** _Kokichi, Kokichi, Kokichi, wake up-_ **

His mind always went back to that day. It was always so  _ vivid. _

His boyfriend, beautiful and bubbly and sweet…

...arms apart, drying with blood. The bathtub full of a gross, reddish brown sludge of vomit and more, more blood.

Tear streaks down his cheeks, words carved into his arms, stomach full of pills,

** _slut, slut, whore_ **

Kaito dragged him out of the tub and held him, even though his body was already cold, fingertips purple from the blood pooling…

He stayed like that for hours, wailing, begging.

His neighbors called for help before he did, hearing the sobs and screams.

When the funeral came around, his eyes looked dull as he was more comforting Maki and Shuichi than he was himself. 

They never asked about how he felt. Just like Kokichi pointed out. 

_ Please don’t waste your care on people who will never return it, my love.. _

Kaito’s train of thought halted. He grabbed his phone and checked his texts. It was the most he could do. He hadn’t been able to leave the house unless it was for groceries, but even, he most often got it delivered.

The screen flashed to life, blinding for a moment. Saihara asking for a sign that he was alive.

Kaito ignored it and went straight to his photos.

_ Memories _

An album, the cover with a selfie from over six months ago. Kaito and Kokichi had been on a date at a coffee shop. Kokichi had whipped cream on the corners of his mouth.

Cute..

He was never one for pictures. Kokichi was the better photographer of the two, and took way more selfies. Although he asked for a lot of pictures from Kaito since he could never get enough of the man..

Kaito thought it was adorable.

He glanced over to the other side of the bed, a lavender-cased phone on the bedside table. He grabbed it.

_ Enter a password _

Kaito remembered it perfectly, even though the phone hadn’t moved since…

He was greeted with a floral, pink background and organized apps. Games and photo editing software. Various social media.

It was perfectly surprising. Unpredictable, just like always. Kaito originally loved him for his wit, looks, and snarkiness, but eventually, it occurred to him that his organic persona beneath all the lies was more beautiful than his eyes and his hair and his skin. His gasping, whining, gentler self was so much more perfect and beautiful than the fanatically manic, sassy little brat that had stolen his heart away.

Tears streamed down Kaito’s cheeks. His throat and chest ached as he reminisced over his photos, his notes, his loving texts…

Finally, he took a look into his recordings.

_ Listen to me _

The astronaut raised a brow, getting comfortable as he hesitated. He’d watched videos over and over again of Kokichi and his own happy moments, but he was a little eager to hear something new from the boy’s voice after months of living without him.

So, he played the file.

There was a bit of shuffling for a moment, some light breathing.

Kokichi spoke, warbled and stuffy.

_ “Kai-chan… Kaito…” _

His small voice shook with quiet sobs.

_ “I’m sorry… I’m so sorry. I don’t wanna hurt you… I don’t wanna leave you alone… I really do love you, I just…” _

A sigh.

_ “It must feel so fucking horrible living with such a damn.. useless little whore-“ _

A choke.

_ “I’m so sorry I’m such a mess. I’m so sorry that I’m about to hurt you, I’m so sorry that I’m so fucking stupid..-” _

Kaito threw the phone, smashing it against the wall. That much was enough. 

He stared at it, throat tightening as he came to terms with the fact that he had destroyed what he had left of Kokichi. 


End file.
